Hendersonville, North Carolina ~ 828.785.2389

March 11, 2013

Thoughts on Motherhood | Hendersonville Photographer

Today I came across a great article that another mom shared on Facebook.  I'll share the article in the minute, but I wanted to add a few of my own thoughts on this subject first.
If you know me well, you know I do not mother hen my children.  I let and fully expect them to be independent little & teenage people.  I do not cater to their every whim or need.  I allow them to learn to take care of themselves and not need me to function in life.

 I believe that many people over the years have probably seen this as being lazy or neglectful.  Honestly, some of it, on some days, is probably a bit of laziness on my part.  But I'm tired most days after just trying to take care of every one's basic needs.  Making sure everyone gets up on time and dressed for school.  Making sure lunches are packed.  Driving four different kids to four different locations all before 8:30am in the morning.  Picking up the house and doing all the dishes and laundry, only to find everything a mess again 30 minutes later.  Helping kids with homework, and projects.  Trying to put out cute holiday decorations for my younger ones who beg me regularly to do so.  Trying to keep enough food in this house to keep four growing kids and a hungry husband fed all the time.  That's almost a full time job itself.  Breaking up fights and trying to teach my kids kindness towards each other.  Driving three different boys to three different locations for practice in 30 minutes time.  And then turning around an hour later and driving all over to pick each one of them up and hearing three different times as each one gets in the car, "What's for dinner Mom?"  My four favorite words.  NOT!  Next I get to hear at least one of them complain how they hate what I'm making for dinner.  It's a thankless job I tell you!  I also get to referee screen time for everyone.  Who gets to play which video game or watch TV at what time and on which TV.   Gasp, we let our kids watch TV and play video games!!!  And then there is bedtime and fighting with kids to pick up their rooms so I don't break my neck walking in to put them to bed. Needless to say, I'm a bit worn out by the end of the day. 
 So no, I do not sit everyday and make Pinterest worthy crafts with my preschooler and gourmet meals for everyone every night.  I do not clean my kids rooms for them everyday while they are at school. Our house is never perfectly neat or clean.  And I hate playing board games!
However, I do sometimes manage to get it together and we make some awesome Valentine's cards to pass out at school or a fun Pinterest inspired teacher gift. 
Although this year I failed when we were the only one that forgot to bring Valentine's to dance class.  Occasionally we have family movie night and we will make popcorn & S'mores in the microwave, and camp out in the living room over night.  We are currently working on planting different kinds of little seeds in egg cartons to see what we can make grow.  We sometimes make blanket and pillow forts over the kitchen table, or play Dora Uno, Memory or Go Fish 10x in a row.  And we spend A LOT of time at football, basketball, and baseball games.

 So if someone would like to consider me lazy or neglectful because I don't sit and play Legos or baby dolls with my kids all day long, have at it!   I don't mind really.  Because I know in my heart that I am not neglecting my kids by making them play alone or with each other.  I am not being lazy because I don't chase them all over the playground making sure they don't fall and hurt themselves.  I'm not being a bad mom when I allow them to go outside and play while I'm inside the house.   When I do all these things, I hope I am helping them learn to be more independent.  To learn to entertain themselves and not constantly rely on someone else for their happiness.  I'm not teaching them to be afraid or nervous all the time that something bad might happen.
I do not wish to teach my children that the world revolves around them and their needs.
 I'm not sure why this article spurred this little outpouring.  I guess maybe the commonality between my thoughts and this article are JUDGEMENT!  It's never a good thing.

As you can see, they all look very neglected and unloved.  ;)

And finally, here is the article that caused this crazy post!

Dear Mom on the iPhone, I get it

Now I need to go figure out what's for dinner.  ;)

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